La Vie en Rose

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Wow, time flies! It’s been a while since I’ve written, but so much happened! In the months since I’ve written I’ve been working, been in a car crash, began learning a new language, and went on vacation. Life’s been a bit of a whirlwind, but for now I’ll focus on my vacation.

For the longest time I’ve wanted to visit Montreal. I can’t say exactly why, but it’s been on my list of places to go for some time. Fortunately a friend of mine has a serious case of wanderlust (*waves to her*), so off we went!

Traveling is always interesting and definitely something I think more people should do. Often, we think we don’t have the time, money, energy, etc. to travel, but it just isn’t true! Traveling is all about living on purpose and making deliberate choices. We make time for what we want, so finding time for travel isn’t bad if you just look! Saving up those vacation days at work or planning a weekend trip doesn’t take that much effort. Neither does money! I find a lot of people complain that they don’t have the money to travel, but that isn’t always the case. Spending money on eating out and daily habits (i.e. coffee) costs a lot. Firing up the stove at home or making your own coffee can save you hundreds of dollars a month. Why not trade that daily cup of coffee for a weekend trip cross-country? But I digress. . .

So off to Montreal we went! Neither of us is fluent in French, so I was excited to see how we would fare. Luckily enough, “Parlez vous anglais?” and “Je ne pas compris” got us pretty far and most people were willing to converse with us in English. I should note that the people were incredibly nice in Montreal. Everyone was so willing to help. It was refreshing to be greeted with a smile, as opposed to suspicion. People seemed a tad less jaded there. Public transportation was fairly easy as well. If you’ve seen one subway system (especially NYC’s) you’ve seen them all. Between Google Maps and common sense, we were able to traverse most of Montreal.

My favorite part of Montreal was the food. It’s been my experience that food makes (or breaks) the experience. That said, everything in Montreal was delicious. No, really, EVERYTHING! The croissants, the wine, the smoked meats . . . it was amazing. (Quick side note: Did you know Montreal was known for its smoked meats? I didn’t!) I highly recommend La Banquise for their poutine and Au Pied de Cochon for their foie gras! Note: If you don’t know what foie gras is, don’t look it up, just eat it! Though a bit pricey, the meals were definitely a highlight of the experience.

My second favorite part of Montreal was the shopping! Although those living there definitely had their own style, the boutiques were amazing, albeit expensive. I was able to find great deals on dresses in Boutique Onze and Nu-i Fashion by Vickie. If you ever visit Montreal, definitely look up Nu-i, Vickie is amazing and had so many original styles! I loved the originality of the boutiques, but I also loved the tradition and elegance of places like Ogilvy’s and La Baie d’Hudson. Another thing I loved about Montreal? They have an Underground City! No, they aren’t mole people, but there are miles and miles of tunnels, restaurants, and shops underground, which must prove advantageous during the winter months.

After exploring Montreal, my friend and I traveled to Quebec City. Known as the “Paris of the Americas,” walking through Old Quebec City definitely felt like I was going back in time. Everything was so quaint and decidely European. The fortifications that flank Old Quebec City are lovely and the many turrets of Chateau Frontenac are simply breathtaking. Know what else took my breath away? WALKING. If you’ve been to Old Quebec City, you know just how steep some of those streets are. My friend and I huffed and puffed back up the streets after taking the ferry around the city. It was a bit embarrassing (especially since neither of us are that out of shape), but I was slightly mollified to see other people walking slowly and breathing heavily as well. Once again, the food didn’t disappoint. We went to an Italian place where the drinks were strong and the portions were huge! Shopping on Le Petit Champlain was nice, I especially loved the chocolaterie I found there.

All in all it was a beautiful trip. At night I was exhausted by all the walking, but I loved that the day was filled with so much sight-seeing . . . and food.

“Live on Purpose” is a saying that is a driving force in my life. For me, living on purpose means that I am an active participant in my life and that I create unforgettable moments for myself. Traveling, I think, is an important part of that. “La vie en rose” (made famous by Edith Piaf and Louis Armstrong) literally means “life in pink.” A better translation is to see life through “rose-colored glasses.” Ever the optimist, I choose to live on purpose in la vie en rose. What about you?

Three Things Sandy Taught Me

This past week the Northeast was pummeled by Hurricane Sandy. Thousands lost power and many even lost their homes. I’m glad to say that my family was barely touched amidst all the devastation, but times like this do make you stop and reflect. So below are three lessons Sandy taught me:

1. Be Prepared!

Although reports of Sandy were widespread (remember “Frankenstorm?”) most didn’t take heed. The Northeast can handle a snowstorm here and there, but a hurricane? If you were like me you laughed it off and went about your business. My family bought a few extra loaves of bread but none of us took steps to make sure we were ready. It just didn’t seem necessary. This, however, was a mistake. While I wasn’t personally devastated by the hurricane, many were. So many lost their homes and those that didn’t were left without essentials because they weren’t prepared. Whole lives documented in papers, pictures, and mementos were simply washed away. It really makes you stop and wonder what you need in times like this. Where do you keep your vital information? Is it easily accessible in case of an emergency? Is it organized? If not, perhaps now might be the time to rethink that. Be prepared!

2. Be Thankful!

When I finally came into work,  everyone shared their survival stories. I was shocked! Some fumbled around in the dark without power. Others made do without running water. I myself had to find alternate routes around the fallen trees and roadkill (gross, I know) so that I could get to work. BUT-I didn’t lose power. I didn’t lose water. I sat at home comfortably with plenty of food and drink and entertainment. Indeed, it wasn’t until I saw the photos on news websites that I realized the true extent of the devastation. Although I make it a habit to say “thank you” for at least 5 things everyday, I cannot help but utter a few extra “THANK YOUs” since the hurricane. Even if you were affected, you are alive and can bounce back. Be thankful!

3. Tune IN and Turn OFF!

Although I never lost power, I did take time to turn off my cell (for the first time in weeks…no, seriously) and stay away from my computer. I’m a bibliophile and it felt good to return to that. It’s weird, but I love the scent of books. It felt great to turn an actual page and not wonder who was calling/texting/tweeting me. I realized the world wouldn’t end if I took a little time to get centered and really tune in with what was going on around me. I noticed I don’t even exercise without electronics and it is a little much. So, I’ve committed myself to tune-ing in and turning off once a week. No phone, no computer, no tv (le sigh)- just me with my own thoughts. 

I hope that nothing this disastrous hits us for quite some time, but in case it does, I think these lessons will certainly come in handy. What did Hurricane Sandy teach you?

Cupid, No Means No…I Mean It.

“Valentine’s Day is tomorrow. Are you ready?!?!?”

I really wish the person on the other end of the g-chat could see my face. The closest resemblance was something  like this: o_O. Ready? Does Valentine’s Day warrant “readiness”, or at the very least the excessive use of punctuation marks? I’m going to go ahead and say no. The extensive amount of waxing, tweezing, plucking and polishing that might be deemed “preparation” is already incorporated into my regular routine. *cue music* I enjoy being a girl. But otherwise, is there anything else to be ready for?

Those that know me know I’m not big on Valentine’s Day. If I’m dating you, please regard this statement. Why?  I’d never pass up an opportunity to inflict unneeded anxiety on my love interest du jour. (Ain’t I a stinker?) But yeah, I’m not a fan. Why? It’s just not me. It’s not because I’m bitter. Or angry. Or single. Or because my heart is two sizes too small. It’s just not my thing. I prefer tulips to roses, milkshakes to assorted chocolates, and a sci-fi flick to a rom-com. I don’t really need (or want) the pressure that goes with the day. I’d rather not go out with a sweaty-palmed, blazer-clad gentleman who’s enduring my conversation in the hopes that this dinner and those drinks will win him a night in my boudoir. It won’t. Nice try, though.

If being a valentine means expressing your appreciation and or gratitude toward your love interest, I dig it. But I think demonstrating that appreciation needn’t be rolled up into a day of expensive dinners and gifts. Pause. Rewind. On second thought, lets keep the gifts. I’m all about that. But can we spread that gratitude out throughout the other 364 days? Like…leave the toilet seat down after you use the bathroom. Sit and watch a game with me. Indulge my histrionics. Coo at the 574th picture I’ve showed you of my dog…and be convincing. Bring me takeout when you know I’ve had a long day and don’t feel like cooking. BE with me, you know? Just link lives with me for a while and let’s enjoy one another. I’d rather we do that for the year and take a day off on Valentine’s Day than to do what the other 87% of the world is doing. (The other 13% accounts for those in the second and third world and singles).

So, to answer the question put before me, no. I’m not ready for Valentine’s Day. Never was and probably never will be. If Cupid wants to try me well, just know Cupid, I shoot back. And it isn’t with a bow and arrow. Keep your assault to yourself.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

My Love Letter to My Exes

My astrological sign is Cancer. According to the zodiac I have trouble letting go of the past, especially in relationships. In a way that’s true. Sometimes I think about why things went wrong and how things might be different. That isn’t to say that I’d rather them be different. I am appreciative, grateful even, for their varied entries and exits in and out of my life. I’ve often wondered what I would say to them all if I had the chance. If I could write a love letter to all of my exes. I suspect it would go something like this…

“I love you all. Which is another way of saying, I suppose, that I love none of you. You all were so different. Alike only in your attraction to and admiration for me. A curious thing in itself, since you all connected with a different part of who I am…

For you, it was a happy coincidence. Who knew standing at a bus stop would inspire you to write poem after poem declaring your love? We bonded over long bus rides and summer walks through our neighborhood. I really do hope you name your daughter after me, or at least think to.

I knew we’d be a ‘we’ before you realized it, and even though I let you go to revisit the past, I’m still glad to have linked lives (however briefly) with you. Our Cosby dreams will have to wait til next time.

And you…one act of chivalry sparked a meeting of the minds. You turned me on to Dead Prez and Assata, Nikki Giovanni and Fred Hampton. You were the first that could keep up (and even surpass me) with my verbal sparring. My instincts told me not to trust you and I’m glad I listened. Thanks for the DMV love.

Then there was you. Not quite like the others. Meeting you was a bit of a fluke, but a good one I think. I admired your playfulness and ambition. Loved your determination to break down my walls even more. You fought hard, but my resistance fought harder. Miss those walks by the river, though.

Oh, you. You were a distraction, but a beautiful one. Why? You were trouble. But the best kind. We had a blast living in the moment. You taught me never to look back, but I knew you couldn’t be a part of my life going forward.

I suppose it isn’t very fair to say I didn’t love any of you. I did. Well, pieces anyway. Even the ones too brief to mention individually. I loved the experiences I had with you. Laughing. Traveling. Doing things I’d never done before. Each memory made led to a greater me and for that I’m thankful. I wish you all happiness because, whether you know it or not, I couldn’t be as happy as I am without you. You see, as much as I liked the idea of you, I loved the idea of me.

Love All Ways,

Nobody’s Darling”

A Thought on Prioritizing Pride.

Starting my final semester of law school is SUPER exciting, but hasn’t completely deterred me from writing! I’ve had a lot of thoughts and not enough time to share them with friends (who I’m sure have tired of my musings anyway). During my voracious TV consumption over winter break, I noticed a lot of women acting insane, both on and off the screen. But should any of those engaging in shenanigans be reading I think I’ll keep this focused on what I’ve seen on TV. I watched a girl chase a car two blocks just so she could talk to a guy that dumped her. Let me repeat that for those of you that haven’t watched Teen Mom 2. A young lady, after being dumped, chased a car two blocks, crying and slobbering, in an effort to  speak to the young man (I use this term loosely) that dumped her. Now you can add in all sorts of factors as to why she did what she did, but there’s no escaping the fact that chasing after a car on national television is pretty humiliating…for anyone.

Which is why I know it wouldn’t happen to me. Why?

I care too much about my pride. I’ve been convinced for some time now that if women cared more about their pride than their heart they wouldn’t end up in these predicaments. No chasing cars, no “Marvin’s Room” karaoke, no fights in the club, no eating copious amounts of Haagen Dazs, none of that. Caring about one’s pride would free you up to, oh I don’t know, LIFE! Right about now I can think of all the sayings women have heard since time immemorial about putting pride aside and opening up your heart, but I’m not so sure that that is always the best decision. See, caring about my pride prevents me from all sorts of crazy acts that women in love (or like) do. Does that mean I don’t get hurt? Of course not. But it does mean that I guard myself against embarrassment and humiliation at the hands of someone undeserving. It may be a sin to be prideful, but I think it’s also a sin to give yourself to someone that isn’t giving anything to you.

So no. I won’t be seen chasing cars, chasing boys, sending nighttime pleas for another chance. You won’t catch me engaging in any public displays of aggression against another woman over a man. I won’t cry or text or tweet my heart away about someone who doesn’t have any rightful place in it.

This isn’t to say that I’m the end-all be-all on love. Just that from what I know and see, it seems that women might be a little less heartbroken a little more often if they just prioritized their pride.

Same Ole B

I’ve been away for WAY too long, but duty calls when it comes to the holidays. Christmas was pretty amazing, mainly because I got to display my culinary skills by making Christmas breakfast and dinner. It felt wonderful making great food for my family, even though I’m pretty sure I put them in a food coma and upped their cholesterol with that Paula Deen recipe I used.

Nevertheless it’s a new year. The apocalyptic year, as Mayans tell it. But every ending is a new beginning, so let’s start there. This year is also the year of the dragon in Chinese astrology (well the new year doesn’t start until the 23rd, but still) which means good luck for me! I’ve set personal goals along with the rest of world, but not any resolutions. Why? I don’t believe in them.

I’ve never really liked the “new year, new me” school of thought. Why, after all I went through in the first year, would I abandon all the lessons learned in favor of starting over? That’d be an insult to the previous year. And no, I don’t believe that a “new you” is one that incorporates everything from the past. It can’t if you’re “new”. I like to think of it as a snowball effect. As I learn more and more my sense of self and knowledge increases. That’s how it should be, in my opinion. If I forgot all the good stuff I learned I’d be prone to making the same mistakes as before, and who needs that?

So here’s to the new (and possibly last) year and to being the same old me…but better.

Happy New Year!

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